January 16th 2020 @ 7 pm
Song : “Mr Postman” by the Marvelettes
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”_ Rumi.
Yesterday morning I woke up in a panic as I realized that next Monday is a mail holiday. Martin Luther King Jr day. So I knew I had to get what I wanted written and ready for mail pick up at 5 am this morning. This means the mail picked up today will go out of the prison mail system on Friday. Now nothing goes out until Tuesday morning at the earliest. These are the kind of things that rule you life and your daily activities while incarcerated. In a world dominated by texts and IMs, e-mails and snapchat, Mr Postman is the one I am happiest to see. After visits, mail is the best thing you can get here.
January 18th 2020 @11 am
Song: “Brandy” by Looking glass
“There is no path to happiness. Happiness is the path”. Lao Tseu.
Here I find myself on the happiness path. I often ask myself how can someone who’s been locked in a cage for 2 decades find happiness? How can this person maintain a measure of sanity? More and more I wonder if those who can adapt to 20;30;40 years of solitary confinement are the crazy ones? And those who cannot are the sane ones? Because you’ve got to be crazy to endure that kind of treatment, don’t you?
Ha ha! I’m starting to give myself a headache, so I will get back to what I know, keeping my focus on today and giving my best effort in what I do, thereby creating reliable satisfaction each and every day. That’s one of the secrets to the path to happiness, didn’t you know?
January 20th 2020 @ 12 am
Song: “What’s going on?” by Marvin Gaye
“I’ve decided to stick with love. Hate is too heavy a burden to bear”_ Dr Martin Luther King Jr.
Today is Martin Luther King day for us here and that means it’s another holiday for us. For lunch we got fried chicken. In prison and death row now, fried chicken is the best meal we are given. It’s rare and we have it every 2 or 3 months. I put myself to think how things are today compared to 10 years ago, and sometimes it’s difficult to stay positive. So I would rather focus and stick to love. If I can effect every person that is in my social circle and in a positive, constructive way share love and they in turn do the same, we can change the world. Sometimes I lose myself in the complicated details, but it really is that simple. As we know, simple things can be very difficult to do, but they are worth doing. I feel like this month has slid by and I have not got as much as I wanted to be done. It’s easy to let frustrations or people, situations, distractions pull me off course. But I have 10 good days in January to get things done and I will give it a go. I am thinking about my death row story and I do believe my period of waiting for my partner to write again is over. That’s holding me back. So I am “psyching” myself up for that. Anyway, life surprises me and I just have to keep on pushing, so I can get to where I am headed. Where it’s always sunny!