Journal entries – April 23-29, 2020

Thursday April 23rd 2020

Song: “Who’s loving you” by JACKSON 5

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2xc8xZ0tV0

“Faith lightens the path your shadowed mind has to walk” Michelle Horst.

Yesterday, an F2 tornado came within 15 miles of Polunsky unit. The news report it hit the towns of Corrigan and Onalaska. We woke up to no recreation, showers only due to staff shortages. They say they had about 20 call-ins from the guards saying their houses/families had been affected by the tornado. Why is there so much chaos in the world right now? Could it be that Mother Earth is so damaged that she is reacting in these dangerous deadly ways? There is an increase in tornadoes and hurricanes, and now covid19! I hear on the news how there is no pollution in the sky of Los Angeles, the water is blue in Venice, Italy, and on and on. I know everything happens for a reason including the tornado which is teaching many a very hard lesson.

I have made it through a couple of big hurricanes and now a little tornado has passed by a little too close for comfort. We have a saying here when someone asks you how you are doing.  We often say “Trying to stay out of the way!” Now more than ever I am trying to stay out of the way of coronavirus, tornadoes and whatever else shoots by trying to make me a victim! My eyes and ears are wide open.

 

Saturday April 25th 2020

Song: “For what it’s worth” by Billy Porter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ba3b-wBut8s

“A hundred objects close by”

“I know a cure for sadness: let your hands touch something that makes your eyes smile. I bet there are a hundred objects close by that can do that. Look at beauty’s gift to us. Her power’s so great she enlivens the earth, the sky, our soul.” Mira.

Do you often feel sad because of our new world that requires us to confine ourselves to our homes? If you are feeling sadder than usual, I totally understand. I fight that battle from time to time. It’s easy to see all that we have lost to the covid19 virus and easily fall into a fog of depression. But have you ever given thought to monks who choose a solitary lifestyle? They live in a simple cell, spend much of their time in silence and meditation, and they love it! One thing this kind of soul recognizes is beauty. In nature, in people, in spiritual text. So why is it so difficult for us to live on lockdown? I honestly believe it’s not. We just make it hard. If you’re down, find something beautiful to behold.

 

Monday 27th April 2020

Song: “Rainy night in Georgia” by Brook Benton

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDRbF80NKDU

“Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of fear and prejudices and the acceptance of Love back into our hearts. Love is the essential reality and our purpose on earth. To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life. Meaning does not lie in things, it lies in us.” Marianne Williamson.

Made it through a very busy and productive week-end, which makes me feel good and I am into this week with a good start. Well, the tornado got us again. Due to staff shortages, recreation was canceled on Texas death row, so that meant showers early in the morning. I find it interesting that an  untold number of people sit at home unemployed needing a job, but these devils don’t have enough guards to run this dump! Something is off about that picture if you ask me. Maybe I’m getting old and grumpy! None of it matters because none of it affects the bigger picture in life. I have realized it is easy to fall into a negative frame of mind which is a bad habit. I am grateful that I see and understand such things for they take away from my learning that comes from my spiritual journey. Let Love and working for the good be my focus, spreading those blessings is much more useful to my soul.

 

Wednesday 29th April 2020

Song: “A change’s gonna come” by Sam Cooke.

 

“Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength. Carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” Corrie Ten Boom

Today about noontime, Polunsky unit death row was put on medical lockdown because of a positive test of covid19 in a general population guard. I woke up this morning at about 6 am and went to recreation outside at 6:30 am to 8:30 am, and it was business as usual. After lunch I took a nap because I was up late writing last night. When I woke up about 2 or 3 pm, everything was shut down. The guard on duty told us that we had been put on “medical lockdown” because a guard in general population had tested positive for covid19. Apparently because of this unnamed individual exposed guys/prisoners in general population, we were locked down. As far as I know, there are no sick prisoners on death row or in the general population. It would seem that the next two weeks will tell us if anyone has contracted coronavirus. We received paper sack meals for dinner, so that will be what we are given and we will just have to make the most of this situation. I am healthy and strong and feel great. No one around me is sick so I am grateful for that. Stay tuned for more info!